Some texts leave readers with a largely idealistic impression of a theme or issue, while others leave readers with a more realistic or believable impression of the same theme or issue. (2015 Q1)
#625Lab. Corrected by experienced examiner, graded as H3 with feedback on how to improve below. You may also like: Leaving Cert English Complete Guide (€).
I have studied ‘Wuthering Heights’ [WH] BY Emily Brontë, ‘A Doll’s House’ [ADH] by Henrik Ibsen, and “Juno”, directed by Jason Reitman. As a teenager in the twenty-first century, i found ‘Juno’ to be the most relatable to my own life. While WH and ADH often portrayed the theme of love and relationships in quite an idealistic way, all three texts provided a variety of both believable and idealistic elements. For example, while Heathcliff’s undying love for Cathy can sometimes come across as overly romanticised, his abusive treatment of Isabella is a very prevalent and common issue in life today. (The introduction needs to set up your answer clearly. How will you be addressing the question and what is your main argument? I would avoid the example here as you cannot develop it in the introduction)
In my opinion, both ADH and ‘Juno’ present very realistic portrayals of marital breakdowns. (Relate to your theme) Vanessa and Mark’s relationship ultimately does not work because they want different things in life- Vanessa’s one true desire is to become a mother, whereas Mark simply wants to concentrate on his music. ‘Well, aren’t you the cool guy?’. (Quote needs to introduced/explained). Mark keeps his interests confined to a single room- ‘she’s got you on a long leash, Mark’ and keeps his true feelings about the adoption to himself until he reveals his plans to leave Vanessa. ‘It feels a little like bad timing.’ This kind of secrecy is also seen between Nora and Torvald in ADH. From early on in the first act there are hints that the relationship is not quite as perfect as it initially appears. Nora ‘pops the bag of macaroons in her pocket’ before Torvald can see her eating the forbidden treat . Nora soon reveals to Mrs Linde that she is keeping a rather large secret from her husband- she says, ‘it was I who found the money’ to save Torvald’s life. Nora is aware that Torvald would not be happy if he were to find out her secret. It was no surprise to me that by the end of these two texts, both of these marriages had disintegrated. It is clear to me that, with this lack of transparency and honesty between a couple, a happy and healthy relationship is unrealistic. (Good comparison between two texts and good reference to question)
Though I was happy with Nora’s decision to leave Torvald, I found her sacrifice of her children at the end of the play to be unrealistic. In contrast, Cathy’s sacrifice of her and Heathcliff’s relationship for materialistic reasons was very realistic and relates very much to our modern money-obsessed society. (Good purpose and effective comparison) Nora is a very loving mother and cares deeply about her children, and this makes it difficult to understand how she could bear to leave them, even in order to escape her marriage. ‘ I don’t want to see the children. I know they’re in better hands than mine’. In my view, most mothers would take their children with them, or stay with their husband in order to be with them. This is very different to WH, where Cathy’s motivation behind her betrayal of Heathcliff and their relationship is far more believable. Heathcliff is of a lower social class than her- ‘it would degrade me to marry Heathcliff’. Edgar Linton, on the other hand, is rich, and it is no surprise that she chooses social status over love. ‘He will be rich, and i shall like to be the greatest woman of the neighbourhood’. In our increasingly image-obsessed society, true love outweighing status and wealth is a highly idealistic notion, and Cathy’s decision is significantly more representative of real life. (Good argument here but ensure adequate development)
I felt that ‘Juno’ was also successful in portraying an accurate teenage friendship. The support and humour between Juno and Leah is very realistic in my opinion. In ADH on the other hand, I do not think that Nora and Mrs Linde’s friendship is very true to life. When Mrs Linde first arrives into Nora’s home early in Act One, it is revealed the pair had not been in contact for almost ten years. Nora did not even write to Mrs Linde when she heard her husband had died three years prior. ‘Something else always cropped up.’ Despite the decade-long separation of the two, Mrs Linde did not hesitate to become immediately involved in Nora’s marital issues. I found this aspect of their relationship to be quite unbelievable. It was Mrs Linde who decided that Nora must tell Torvald her secret- ’Helmer must know the truth. This unhappy secret of Nora’s must be revealed.’ This is quite a personal decision that many people would not share with their closer friends, let alone someone they hadn’t talked to in ten years. In contrast, Juno and Leah are very close. Leah is the first person Juno tells about her pregnancy, and Leah instantly supports her, and offers her a ride to the abortion clinic. (Watch sentence structure here.) Leah does not judge Juno when she changes her mind, and she stands by her throughout the duration of the film. She does not hesitate to call her out, however, when she sees Juno’s jealousy, and this shows the strength of their friendship. ‘Are you jealous?’ The humour between the pair -’it’s probably just a food baby’ – creates an endearing and accurate portrayal of a true friendship. (Is this realistic or idealistic? How does this link to your theme? Your theme was never explicitly stated in the essay)
While, in my opinion, ‘Juno’ has proven to be the most realistic of the three texts I have studied, I felt that the film ended a little too perfectly. Despite the various issues the characters faced throughout the film, everyone got their happy ending. (slightly informal) In a similar way, I found that Heathcliff and Hareton’s relationship towards the ending of WH to be unrealistic. Heathcliff undoubtedly treated Hareton cruelly, and I do not think that Hareton’s fondness for his uncle later on is an authentic representation of real life. (Good) Both texts showcase idealistic outcomes for their characters. Mark and Vanessa decide to separate, but there is no mention of the long and tedious divorce process- we only find out that Mark gets his long-awaited studio apartment, and Vanessa finally becomes a mother. The pregnancy seems to have little emotional effect of either Juno or Paulie- both are content to play music together without a care in the world. Even Brenda finally gets a dog. While it is always enjoyable to see characters get their happy ending, I think that the denouement of this film was overly-optimistic and not very lifelike. Similarly, despite Heathcliff’s abusive behaviour- ’now my bonny lad, you are mine! And we’ll see if one tree won’t grow as crooked as another with the same wind to twist it’- Hareton is ‘the only one that really suffered much’ following Heathcliff’s death. I think it is quite idealistic to imagine that Hareton would hold Heathcliff to such a high regard after the way he had treated him. (Some excellent comparisons and references to key words of question)
Hareton was not the only one to suffer from Heathcliff’s abuse, and Heathcliff’s treatment of Isabella in particular presents a very shocking though unfortunately realistic portrayal of domestic violence. In a very comparable way, the coercive control that Torvald exerted over Nora in ADH is very representative of real life. (Excellent) As, reportedly, one in five women in Ireland who have been in relationships have been abused by a former or current partner, both of these relationships can be related to the real lives of thousands of women. (Sentence a little clunky here). Before Heathcliff marries Isabella, it is clear their relationship is not based on love, but rather on revenge. Heathcliff vows that if he were to marry Isabella, he’d ‘turn the blue eyes black.’ Throughout the novel we are presented with several examples of both the verbal and physical abuse Isabella is subjected to. Heathcliff says he has ‘sometimes relented from pure lack of invention, in my experiments on what she could endure.’ He calls her a ‘mere slut’ and a ‘pitiful, slavish, mean-minded brach’. Though Torvald does not physically abuse Nora, there is strong evidence of psychological torture in their relationship. From the hints of his controlling nature at the beginning of the text-’[wags his finger]: has my little sweet-tooth been indulging herself in town today?’ – to his shocking reaction at the end, it is evident that the Helmers’ marriage is not a healthy one. Upon hearing of Nora’s secret debt, Torvald instantly thinks only of himself and his social image-’you have ruined my whole future’. In his view, ‘it means she has become his property in a double sense.’ This kind of controlling mindset is not uncommon in abusive relationships, and in my opinion, both Ibsen and Brontë have successfully represented controlling and manipulative marriages in a believable way. (Very strong comparisons here to support a strong argument. Be careful that your language is confident in order to strengthen your point.)
From my study of my comparative texts, I have been left with a variety of both realistic and idealistic impressions of the theme of love and relationships. As a result I have gained a deeper insight into this theme and its role in real life. While the realistic elements were easier to comprehend and relate back to my own life, the elements of idealism and exaggeration in the texts added to my enjoyment and engagement with the texts. (Brief but effective conclusion).
P -16 /21 There is evidence of clear purpose here with excellent comparisons and some clear references to the question. The thematic content is slightly unclear at the beginning and the essay takes two or three paragraphs to get going.
C -16 /21 This is a coherent essay and it is well-structured. Introduction loses marks and it does not set up the essay.
L – 15/21 Language is mostly very good. Be careful with sentence structure. Read over essay to ensure sentences flow well.
M – 6/7 Very good. You do not need a comma before/after the word and.
Overall mark and comment: 53/70 – 76% – H3
An excellent essay overall which could easily develop into a H2 grade after some small edits.